recoup

Well, I guess I was more tired than I realized. I slept today until about 10. Wow. Seeing how I am usually awake by 5 or 6, Mr. was very surprised. So was I.

I simply didn't get going after sleeping in so late. I "facebooked", showered, and off we went for lunch. After lunch all I wanted to do was nap again, but I was teaching Sunday school this afternoon, so I had to prepare my lesson. That took me up to the time that we needed to leave for church. (We go in the afternoon.) Taught 8 very energetic 4 to 7 year-olds. Battled some wills; helped to cut, color, and paste; hoped a little biblical truth got through. Noodle soup for supper, home.

I should be making greeting cards right now, because someone is flying back to the US and I need to send birthday, get-well, and sympathy wishes. But I am feeling very unmotivated. So, I'm blogging.

To follow up on some things from my previous posts, Mr. is doing better. I sense that the deeper sadness is still there, although the surface irritant from two days ago (computer problems) has been taken care of. However, he's back to his normal steady self. All I can do is encourage, and pray that God ministers to the underlying hurt in his heart.

The youth banquet last night was great. Sometimes the kids surprised me with how young they were. Overflowing with energy, they barely needed a reason to yell, laugh giddily, jump and spin like crazy, sing at the top of their lungs. I remember feeling like that once, but just barely.

At other times they impressed me with their maturity. Unsure of myself and where I fit as a "chaperone" I hung back often. A number of them tried to draw me in and include me. At another time, the youth leader asked everyone to make a circle and talk about youth group, what had been meaningful to them in the past year, and pray. The flow of the conversation was totally up to them, and if they had kept it short they could have been back to dancing in no time. But they shared significant things and prayed for over an hour. I think that's pretty deep for kids their age.

And they loved my decorations. I hope it made them feel special that someone took that time for them. Another chaperone complimented me on how the room looked, and I told him, "Well, I'm a frustrated set designer." 

The more I thought about it, the more I realized it was true. I am a set designer without a stage. Making a set is like creating a little world. I control everything about that world—the lighting, the scenery, the colors: all that the audience sees. Every little detail is my call.

In real life, all I can hope for is to make the world a little more beautiful. I don't control much at all about this world, where ugly seems to dominate. So when I get the opportunity to create just a little beauty here and there, I jump at it.

It felt good to make that room beautiful for those kids yesterday.

The whole time I've been typing the kitty has been sleeping. Mr. just roughed her up and tussled her awake, and now he's dangling her favorite toy for her to attack. Those two are very happy presences in my life, although I'm not sure that they are as fond of each other as I am for both of them. :-)