normal

We finally found time today to get my echo cardiogram done. (If you're counting, that's another first before forty.) All of the results came back “normal”. I came home and cried.

Poor Mr. He was bewildered. “I thought normal was good.” Yes. I guess it is. But much of the time I do not feel quite right, and I was just hoping to get things figured out and dealt with, so that I could start feeling better. Do you know how frustrating it is to come out “normal” when you don't feel normal?

I have a follow-up visit with the original doctor tomorrow, and we'll talk things through. I suppose I should just get back to life as usual, and stop worrying so much. No more babying myself. Definitely going out jogging tomorrow.

In the mean time I feel like I' drowning under work and unmet responsibilites and ambiguity about the future.

[OK. This was written yesterday, but I did not have time to post it before bed. Reason #79: had friends over who stayed a bit late, added to reason #22, which is, caught an actual American football game on TV and had to stay up even later to watch it with Mr.]